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Sarah’s Poetry (My Review)

hello-there

Hello! Sarah is a blogger and she also writes poetry and blogs. I will be reviewing a few of her poems today! And you can also check out her blog here. Let’s get started.

Sarah's Poetry

I’m going to show you the poems. In short stories or anything bigger, I wouldn’t do this. But it’s hard to “explain” poetry where a part of it’s beauty comes from the authenticity. Not a retelling.

Embers

Doors locked and windows boarded.

Emotions frozen in emptiness.

Time stopped in icy fractals.

Life trapped in utter darkness.

Seasons pass but stay the same.

Colours slowly fade to greyness.

Existence left still, unmoved.

Earth abandoned in silence.

Are you going to strike the match?

Set fire to what long ago was known?

Afraid to turn the pages,

And see what is to come?

Will you let the road takes it’s bend?

Let the darkest shadow shine so bright?

Will you let the cold past burn?

Let the embers take their flight?

My Review of this Poem:

This was a very cool poem. One thing I liked was “Are you going to strike the match?” It’s that kind of action that changes things and I think she emphasized on that. I appreciated it.

In a way, I love the questions. However, I feel like there could be more “context” put into them, dark answers, or mysterious clues. If they were scattered more and it wasn’t a dramatic switch, I would most likely like it more. But, still, this a good poem.

Chasing Lights

Chasing the lights,

Trying to keep you for my own,

In the dark you shine so bright,

Glowing whenever I’m alone.

Shining like stars,

Lighting my corner of darkness,

Until the sun rises afar.

I’ll stand in morning dimness,

And know it’s over.

I know I have to let you go,

But when the night takes over,

I want you as my afterglow,

To be my spark of light in the darkness.

My Review of this Poem:

It’s beautiful. I feel a relationship here. Also, do you know how books sometimes have little rhymes or poems at the beginning? I could see this as one at the beginning fo the book, and when you turn the page it says “Chapter 1.” A spark is so small, yet so powerful in the darkness. I feel like Sarah captured that idea very well. I like this one a lot.

Stay

Trying to stand stable,

Yet the world seems to pull you down.

All your attempts to run are feeble,

And it’s here all your dreams drown.

Chase the shadow ahead,

If you would turn you’d see the light,

It could dry the painful tears you shed,

Soak in the light and shine bright.

Your mind’s filled with questions,

That build up and flood within you.

You’re afraid to make a connection,

Fearing what the flood might do.

Please don’t run from my face.

I want life in those bleeding eyes.

And please don’t keep your thoughts encased,

Covering them up with those lies.

There’s things that I regret,

I don’t want you to be that way.

There’s a door between us, don’t lock it.

If there’s something wrong, just say.

Please don’t ever let us go now.

Don’t let doubt overcome you.

There’s a glimpse of light I see in your eye,

And every single thing you do.

Never ever let go of my hand.

You’re out of that raging water,

You’re standing back on the stable land.

Fear can’t ever win you over.

Turn your head to the light,

Let it dry your tearful eyes,

Soak in the light and shine bright.

Don’t go.

Stay.

Please.

My Review of this Poem:

This was powerful and well-written. At first, it took on the “traditional” sense of the rhymes. (See the first few lines). It wasn’t back-to-back, but it had those rhymes. Then it changed; which I thought was odd.

One thing I would say for this is, “

There’s a door between us, don’t lock it.

If there’s something wrong, just say.”

“Just say it.” would add more of that sense of poetry and it would flow better. This happened a couple of times, but that’s a good example. Other than that, great job!

Beautiful Mess

Free-falling into a void.

We came together for a reason,

A reason that I can’t avoid.

I turn and see your face,

It feels like seeing my reflection,

While we’re floating through time and space.

Every memory flies past,

Shooting by like a star in the sky.

A moment is too quick to last.

This fall can’t ever hurt us,

It never could and it never will,

It will always remain harmless.

Beneath your mask I saw light,

Though this world will try to put it out,

Promise you’ll keep it burning bright.

And when those bullets start falling,

Don’t ever look back, just shut your eyes,

We’ll let them keep on firing,

And I see them all raining,

But they’ll only graze us, never pierce us,

They’ll pass us by, so keep firing.

I take in all the beauty,

Of all the time that’s shooting past,

It’s so pretty yet it’s blurry.

We’re one mess but it’s beautiful,

We are falling at such a fast speed,

Together we’re all colourful.

And all the colours are bright,

So many falling, like an army,

With each other we all ignite.

And though we are still diving,

Diving headlong into the future,

I’ll never know where we’re going.

But we’ll fall. Together. 

My Review of this Poem:

This was a beautiful “journey.” It’s so small but so good. I think this one was one of my favorites. Not because of the style, even, but because of the context and the idea of the “mask” and falling together. There were some good word choices here. “Diving” and “headlong” are two examples of this. They may not have to be looked up in the Thesaurus, however, they are perfect words for imagery.

Unstoppable

Looking up at the dark skies,
Preparing for the rainfall.
Still waiting for the sunrise,
But all I get is this downfall.
I thought I’d found you once,
But change got the best of me.
Are you there?
The world screams you don’t exist,
But my mind tells me you’re somewhere,
It’s just hard to see through the mist.
Can’t see through these blurry lines,
They told me it’s impossible.

I can’t follow those guidelines,
This beating heart’s unstoppable.
Trying to tear down my world?
Then I’ll build it up again.
I’m letting the storm in now,
Maybe I’ll find you someday,
Someone who’ll relate somehow.
Do you know what it’s like to lose your way?
To lose your voice sometimes?
But there’s reasons elsewhere.
Are you there?
The world screams you don’t exist,
But my mind tells me you’re somewhere,
It’s just hard to see through the mist.
I’ll run to the eye of the storm,
Maybe I’ll find someone…
My Review of this Poem:
This was really well-done. I like how in all of this poetry you said, “Are you there?” It’s a simple question. But it was well-placed. My favorite part was Can’t see through these blurry lines, They told me it’s impossible, I can’t follow those guidelines. It made sense and some poetry is often confusing if not done well. This one made you think, but not in a confused or perplexed fashion, but a deep fashion. Well done!

{before you walk away}

Mixed up colours dripping from the brush.
If only you could see the beauty,
The world you’ve created is so lush,
But you won’t admit or say.

What can I do to make you stay?

I hear everything you’re trying to say
Is that enough for you?
Please, look back before you walk away
I see everything in the future, just waiting… for you.

Broken glass on the stoney tiled floor,
Blood and water mixed with each other.
What did you throw your world away for?
But you can’t explain or say.

What can I do to make you stay?

Always been prone to overthinking.
But your world will always call you back.
Its wild colours always resounding,
It calls you home, on your way.

I hear everything you’re trying to say,
Is that enough for you?
Please, look back before you walk away.

My Review of this Poem:

I like how in each “paragraph” there was at least one question. (Look back up to see what I mean). And again, Sarah did the question in the middle, repeating what she had said before; which if done correctly, makes them more powerful. She did it correctly. I really liked this one. It has good imagery as well.

Also, I would like to comment on Sarah’s titles. She chose good titles for these poems. And that can catch an eye more than a synopsis of a story, especially poetry. (If you were to collect all of these and put them in a book with more).


I hope you enjoyed this post. Good job, Sarah! ❤ I really liked all of them and appreciated the work Sarah put in.

All of these were my honest opinion. I understand some may disagree, and I respect that.

If you would like for me to review your poetry, unpublished book, published book, or a short story(ies) let me know. A Miss Review page is underway, along with specific “plans” you can buy. Thanks for reading!

ariana

20 thoughts on “Sarah’s Poetry (My Review)”

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